My British Husband, The Avid Runner | 爱跑步的英国先生
Written by: Yao Feiyan | 姚菲彦
Translated by: Yu Chen Luo
Editor’s Note:
This article is excerpted from Haha! Britain — a charitable bilingual publication co-produced by The Mothers’ Bridge of Love (MBL) and River Cam Breeze. The book is a lively collaboration between 42 Chinese authors living in the UK and 36 university-based volunteer translators. With wit and warmth, the stories capture the everyday realities of Chinese communities in Britain, offering an honest look at the cultural clashes, humour, and adaptation that arise in the space between Chinese and British ways of life. Haha! Britain has been warmly endorsed by several well-known figures in UK-China relations, including Stephen Perry (former Chairman of the 48 Group Club), Luise Schäfer OBE (former British diplomat and Chamber of Commerce chair), Professor Hugo De Burgh (former BBC editor and academic), and British scholar Martin Jacques. The book’s title was handwritten by celebrated British-Chinese artist Qu Leilei, its cover illustrated by bestselling Chinese author and poet Feng Tang, and the postscript contributed by Xue Mo, a prominent voice in contemporary Chinese literature.
Illustrated by Tian Tian
Established in London by an incredible Chinese man named He Yizhou and his friends, the club CUKRUN organised the first Chinese-arranged charity run in London in 2017. In support of this historically significant event, I brought my kids and husband Lao An to participate in this large-scale running race organised by the Chinese community.
As an amateur runner who has completed more than 10 marathons, Lao An breezed through the 10-kilometre run. However, when he went up to collect his award, the runner-up, a fellow Chinese man, stepped forward to challenge the result. “Impossible. He couldn’t have come in first. I led the pack the entire way, and there was no one ahead of me!” It seemed that this lovely fellow might be barking up the wrong tree. From what I observed, Lao An dashed ahead like lightning, leaving him far behind. While I couldn’t exactly recall how much faster Lao An was, it was clear that this skilled runner didn’t even see the dust kicked up by Lao An.
Although Lao An took home the first-place prize, he was banned from participating in future races with my Chinese friends. His blazing speed put him in a league of his own. Now, he’s only allowed to volunteer at Chinese- organised runs.
In Britain, running is practically a national sport. Whether in London or smaller towns, you’ll spot people hitting the streets at dawn, dusk or even deep into the night for a run. Plenty also opt for a lunchtime jog. Brits typically get about an hour for lunch, where they grab a quick bite, sip on coffee and chat. Many enthusiasts squeeze in a run during this time.
Some prefer hitting the treadmill at the gym. But there’s an ironic twist: in the 19th century, British prisoners were sentenced to eight hours of treadmill torture as punishment. In 1818, Sir William Cubitt, an English engineer, invented the first treadmill. Prisoners had to continuously step on a large wheel or risk falling off. By the late 19th century, the British deemed this punishment too cruel and abolished it. Later on, the Americans patented the idea, and it’s now a global phenomenon.
Yet a significant portion of Brits still prefer outdoor running. Throughout the UK, you’ll find events like 5Ks, 10Ks, half marathons and full marathons happening year-round. On weekends, there are park runs where hundreds of people from nearby villages gather to run 5K. There are also charity runs like GoodGym. People enjoy being charitable while running through the scenic British countryside.
Whether it’s freezing cold, windy or raining, Lao An is outside running. He has clocked up thousands of kilometres wearing a no-drills pair of shorts and a tank top, paired with fancy running shoes. He usually leaves his phone, headphones and other gadgets behind. No music or electronic watches are needed. He just loves the freedom of running.
But here’s the kicker: he never takes picturesque, romantic runs. Instead, it’s more common for him to return home covered in mud from a fall, or limping due to an accidental slip into a rabbit hole or molehill. If you look closely at his eyes, you’ll see mosquitoes trapped in his eye sockets. To top things off, he’d often return home carrying a bag of trash, smelling of sweat and garbage. This is not the kind of running most Asians can imagine doing!
Lao An runs like the wind, but my stubby legs can’t keep up. To match his pace, I resort to a mountain bike, and even then, barely manage to keep up. As Lao An enjoys picking up litter while jogging, both of his hands and my bike’s handlebars are usually adorned with various plastic bags after an hour with him. That’s why I can’t have him tagging along whenever I yearn for a bike ride in the forest! Even thinking about taking a leisurely beach stroll with Lao An requires careful consideration. During our beach holiday in Thailand, he insisted on running along the shore every morning. Over time, I’ve become accustomed to watching his carefree figure dash off and return drenched in sweat, clutching a heap of garbage in his hands. Seeing how much he enjoys it, I can’t help but shake my head and smile with fondness.
About the author
Yao Feiyan graduated from Peking University with a double major in information management and economics. In 2002, she pursued her studies at the London School of Economics and Political Science (LSE). Following her graduation, Yanfei spent nearly twenty years working in research and development management roles in the fields of computer technology and telecommunications at various multinational corporations. Concurrently, she pursued further studies in Telecommunications Engineering, Education and International Chinese Education at Queen Mary University of London, University of Cambridge and Jinan University. In recent years, Yanfei transitioned into the role of an education consultant, focusing on organising social practice activities and community service for young people, all while maintaining a commitment to holistic education.
一位很了不起的同胞何一舟，带领一群中国朋友在伦敦创办了“跑动英伦”俱乐部，于 2017 年在伦敦举办首届华人慈善跑。为了支持华人首届有历史意义的活动，我带上孩子和老安加入了这次华人组织的大型跑步比赛。
曾经跑过 10 多次马拉松的业余跑手老安，这次轻松跑完 10公里。上台领奖时，第二名的同胞站出来挑战说：“不可能，他不可能是第一名。我一路跑在最前面，在我之前没有别人了！”这位可爱的同胞怕是误判了情况。据我观察，老安一溜烟跑出去，比他快了好多，虽说我记不得到底快了多少，但是这位很能跑的同胞的确连老安掀起的灰尘都没看到。可是，这个洋女婿抱得第一名奖品、奖牌，回家后，不仅被揪着耳朵训了一番，还遭到了禁赛——日后不许跟我的中国朋友们赛跑。因为他跑得太快，让我们同胞尴尬啊！不过我还是允许他今后作为志愿者的身份出现在华人举办的跑步活动里。
说起跑步，在英国生活过的朋友们可能还真无法否认，这是普罗大众最喜欢的运动项目。在伦敦或者其他大小城市都能看到人们于晨早、傍晚，甚至是深夜在大街小巷里跑步。不过也有很多人选在中午。英国人午休时间一般是一个小时左右，大家吃简餐、喝咖啡、聊天，有很多人就是利用这个午休去跑步的。也有很多人喜欢在健身房跑步。不过这就很有讽刺性了，因为据说 19 世纪的英国囚犯就是被罚每天在跑步机上跑 8 个小时！ 1818 年，英国工程师邱比特爵士发明了第一台跑步机。运作时，囚犯被迫站在一条大滚轮上持续踏步，否则就会跌下来。19 世纪末，英国人觉得这一刑罚过于残忍，便废除了它。然而，这种跑步机却被美国人注册了专利，现在风行全球。其实很一大部分的英国人还是喜欢在户外跑步的。大大小小的 5 公里、10 公里、“半马”、“全马”等各种项目在英国上下，一年四季都有。周末的公园里有时候举办“公园跑（Parkrun）”，通常就是附近几个村的上百人一起跑 5 公里。还有近年流行的“公益跑（GoodGym）”，大都以公益慈善为目的。英国著名的乡村美景，加上有益身心健康的户外长跑，想想都浪漫。
不管是天寒地冻，刮风下雨，老安都会去跑步。他喜欢穿条不讲究的短裤和背心，配上一双很讲究的跑步鞋，一跑就是十几二十公里。他一般不带手机，不戴耳机，不听音乐，也不需要什么电子手表，他就喜欢全身无牵无挂，像个野孩子那样去奔跑。热爱跑步如他，却从来没有漂亮地跑出去美丽地跑回来过，所以也很难浪漫起来。他回来时，不是摔得浑身是泥巴，就是一瘸一拐的，因为时常不小心踩到兔子洞或鼹鼠洞，扭伤了脚。再不然，就是回来后，若你认真地看他的脸，会发现有好几个飞过来撞死，憋死在他那深深的眼窝里的蚊虫！这个应该是亚洲人想都想不来的结果吧！另外，很多时候他是抱着脏垃圾回来，浑身散发着臭汗加臭垃圾味。
老安跑步太快了，我的一双小短腿根本没法跟上他的节奏。我骑上山地越野车，勉强能不累死地陪跑。往往跑一个小时下来，他的手里和我的单车手把上都会挂满了各种塑料垃圾袋，因为老安喜欢一边跑步一边拾捡垃圾。所以，当我真的想去森林里过骑车瘾的时候，绝对不能让他跟着！想跟他去海滩散步也都要三思。有一次我们去泰国海边度假，每天早上老安都要去沙滩上跑步，我已经习惯了看着他潇洒跑出去的身影，也习惯了他浑身臭汗跑回来手捧一堆臭垃圾的模样！不知道看着喜欢这样子跑步的他我是该笑还是该哭。
作者介绍
姚菲彦，毕业于北京大学信息管理（双学位经济学），2002 年旅英求学于伦敦政治经济学院（LSE），毕业后在不同跨国公司从事电脑科技以及电信研发领域的研发管理工作近二十年，又在伦敦玛丽女王学院、剑桥大学以及暨南大学进修攻读了电信工程、教育学以及国际中文教育课程。近年来转行做教育顾问，秉持全人素质教育的朴实愿景常年组织青少年的社会实践活动、民间公益活动等。
Both the Chinese and English editions of Haha! Britain can be purchased at the following platforms:
· BOOK FAN